| My daughter was diagnosed with autism in May | | | | suggests you try CBT for one year before |
| 2008. For several months after getting the | | | | considering medication. |
| diagnosis I had a very hard time believing it. Many | | | | 2. Focus on the anxiety. You need to treat the |
| people told me it can be very difficult to accept | | | | anxiety that lies underneath the verbal issues. Do |
| your child is autistic but the quicker you accept it, | | | | not try to make your child talk (this may only |
| the better off your daughter will be. I decided to | | | | lead to further anxiety). This is why ABA therapy |
| go ahead and start the therapy path suggested | | | | is one of the worst types of therapies for an SM |
| to me but I continued to feel my daughter's | | | | child. ABA tries to bring the language out. Once |
| diagnosis may be wrong. | | | | ABA therapy sessions began for my daughter, |
| When given the diagnosis, I was told there was | | | | they caused a tremendous amount of stress for |
| nothing I can do for her but to get her help | | | | her. The therapists did not know it then, but they |
| through the state with therapy sessions. It took a | | | | were making her anxiety worse. This is why it is |
| very long time to get the therapy set up for my | | | | very important to discover if you child has SM |
| daughter. In the meantime, I started on my own | | | | and autism or just SM. I believe in ABA therapy |
| crusade. While researching and talking to people, I | | | | for autistic children but please make sure your |
| learned a lot from so many other parents and | | | | child has the correct diagnosis before |
| teachers who deal with autism every day. | | | | implementing any type of therapy. |
| The first mom I ran into told me to try the | | | | 3. Build confidence. Dr. Morgan-Gillard said, For |
| Gluten Free / Casein Free diet. This diet helped | | | | young children, the behavioral part of CBT |
| alleviate her obsessive-compulsive behaviors, cut | | | | treatment is what is effective at first, because |
| out her 2 hour tantrums, she began interacting | | | | they do not have the capacity to identify their |
| with her siblings more, she no longer pulled her | | | | thoughts or reason with themselves to change |
| hair out and started sleeping through the night. | | | | their thoughts (that's the cognitive part of the |
| Another mom told me to take red dye out of | | | | CBT) until about age 7. CBT therapy can be |
| her diet. I did this and it helped lessen the | | | | implemented by helping your child complete tasks |
| tantrums even more: It seemed to help calm her | | | | that cause a lot of anxiety for them. Approach |
| down. I met a dad who told me about a | | | | these tasks by pulling them apart into workable |
| supplement called "TMG" (Trimethylglycine with | | | | phases. For instance, take your child to the |
| Folic Acid & B12). This supplement helped | | | | grocery store and ask them to place an item on |
| level her tantrums as well. When I tested her and | | | | the conveyer belt. Overtime, once they are |
| took her off this supplement she was less social | | | | comfortable with that ask them to hand the |
| and more emotional. When I say emotional, she | | | | money to the clerk. Once they are okay with |
| was just not very happy or as happy while on | | | | that, ask them if they want to say "Hello" to the |
| the supplement. | | | | clerk. And so on. It may take a long time before |
| All of the above treatments I mentioned helped | | | | your child will want to talk to a stranger so you |
| tremendously but then I met some people that | | | | never want to push that. The goal to this form of |
| changed her and my life forever; her special | | | | therapy is to make the child gain confidence and a |
| education preschool teachers. They questioned if | | | | level of comfort in normally high anxiety situations. |
| she was "really" autistic from when they first met | | | | Children and adults that have SM are afraid of |
| her and seemed to think she was a Selective | | | | being judged in a negative manner when they are |
| Mute (SM). | | | | put into a high anxiety situation. For instance, kids |
| SM is considered a rare psychological disorder. It | | | | may not talk because they do not want the |
| causes high social anxiety in the people who have | | | | attention to focus on them. Maybe they are |
| it. Children and adults who have typical speech in | | | | afraid they will say something incorrectly or give |
| comfortable settings may not say one word or | | | | the wrong answer. By encouraging your child to |
| act extremely "shy" in social settings. For instance, | | | | talk to people at a young age and ensuring they |
| some kids will talk freely at home but once they | | | | receive a positive response, you are helping to |
| arrive to school they clam up and don't say one | | | | build their confidence and self-assurance. This is |
| word. Or, like in my daughter's case, they only | | | | the basis of CBT. |
| whisper. | | | | 4. Play dates are very important for small children |
| Some of these kids get diagnosed with autism | | | | with SM. Dr. Morgan-Gillard suggest you have as |
| because they appear to have autistic | | | | many play dates as humanly possible. With SM, |
| characteristics while being evaluated. My daughter | | | | the more frequent a repetition of something, the |
| would hardly say one word to the psychologist. | | | | better. If you could have a play date every day, |
| She would not want to participate in answering | | | | it would speed progress. When the child is in his |
| their questions because her social anxiety would | | | | her comfortable setting, they can more quickly |
| basically paralyze her. She would not exchange | | | | move to feeling socially comfortable with a peer, |
| any eye contact. She would pinch her fingers in | | | | and toward talking with that peer. It's best to |
| situations of high anxiety (which we used to think | | | | repeat play dates with the same peer for a while; |
| was stimming). When a psychologist would ask | | | | then add another peer or switch play dates to |
| question after question, she did not say one word. | | | | another peer and repeat with that one, then add |
| If we were at home, she would have answered | | | | two together after a while, said Dr. Morgan-Gillard. |
| them all without hesitation. | | | | 5. Act silly. If you can act silly around your child |
| Kids that are autistic can also have high social | | | | and be physically active with them, it may help |
| anxiety. This is where it may become confusing if | | | | reduce their anxiety level. I actually tried this at a |
| the person diagnosing your child is not familiar with | | | | birthday party. All of the kids were playing with |
| SM or if they are not thinking outside of the | | | | the clown and running around acting like farm |
| "autism box." You can most likely tell an autistic | | | | animals. My daughter ran over to stand by my |
| child from a SM child because most autistic | | | | side and held onto my leg as tight as possible. I |
| children experience stimming, poor eye contact, | | | | took her hand and walked into the middle of the |
| sensory issues and repetitive behaviors in any | | | | crowd of kids. I started acting like a farm animal |
| situation. However, as I mentioned above | | | | too. She looked up at me with complete surprise. |
| regarding my daughter, she experienced many of | | | | The other parents gave me the same look but it |
| these characteristics ONLY in social settings. If this | | | | didn't faze me. I wanted my daughter to know it |
| behavior sounds familiar to you then you may | | | | is okay to act silly. She jumped right in with me. |
| want to have your child reevaluated and bring up | | | | We played farm animals for quite some time. |
| your concerns of SM. Remember to video tape | | | | 6. Don't say they are shy. A tip I learned from |
| you child at home so the psychologist can see | | | | my sister was to never call my daughter, "Shy." |
| how they act in a comfortable setting. | | | | Previously, this response was second nature for |
| The more research I do, the more I believe my | | | | me. I always felt uncomfortable when a stranger |
| daughter had the "perfect storm" and that is | | | | would approach us and tell me how cute my child |
| what led her to the autism diagnosis. I haven't | | | | was and then try to ask my daughter a question |
| mentioned a major point in my daughter's story | | | | and she would not respond. When my daughter |
| yet. She has a food allergy (Celiac disease) that | | | | would hide behind my leg and not say one word I |
| gave her certain characteristics of autism. The | | | | used to come back and say, "Oh. She is shy." My |
| combination of those characteristics and having | | | | sister brought up a good point and told me not to |
| high social anxiety looks just like autism. | | | | label her. If my daughter hears me say this over |
| I never bought into her autism diagnosis because | | | | and over, then maybe she will believe she is shy. |
| she never had the hand flapping or body rocking, | | | | Now, I just give the stranger and smile and say, |
| none of the physical sensory treatments were | | | | "Have a nice day." |
| working for her (actually had opposite effects), | | | | These are the tips and therapy suggestions I |
| she was always very affectionate (loved to get | | | | have found helpful to date. I am always |
| hugs and being held) and she was very compliant. | | | | researching and looking for ways to help my |
| So many things just didn't fit for me. I always | | | | daughter. My next target of research is art and |
| questioned it. I never knew if I was questioning it | | | | music therapy. Although I am still in my learning |
| because I didn't want to believe it or if it was just | | | | phase of SM, I felt compelled to share what I |
| a wrong diagnosis. | | | | have learned because any parent of a child who |
| When the teachers first suggested SM I started | | | | has been recently diagnosed with SM knows |
| my research and the more I learned, the more it | | | | there is not a lot of information available. |
| seemed to fit my daughter like a glove. I finally | | | | I am happy to announce my daughter was |
| had a diagnosis that made sense. I could finally get | | | | re-diagnosed in May of 2009. After one year of |
| my daughter the correct treatment she needed. | | | | questioning her autism diagnosis we finally |
| I set off to research treatment plans for SM and | | | | received a diagnosis that made sense: She is no |
| found it very difficult to find any information. Over | | | | longer considered autistic and has SM. I stopped |
| a week's time, I sadly learned there is just not a | | | | the ABA therapy instantly. The state dropped her |
| lot of information available for SM. I posted many | | | | because she is no longer considered disabled which |
| posts on this disorder on my blog and received a | | | | was bitter sweet. I am now on my own trying to |
| tremendous amount of feedback from other | | | | help my daughter with the CBT approach. I feel |
| parents looking for more information as well. | | | | incredibly hopeful and have seen tremendous |
| I was very excited when I met a woman online | | | | improvements in my daughter; so much so that I |
| who is a psychologist with a SM daughter. Her | | | | now consider her to be a "typical" child. |
| name is Shannon Morgan-Gillard, Psy.D. She runs a | | | | I hope my daughter's story will help educate the |
| clinic for SM children; The Brave Center.I asked | | | | public on Selective Mutism. I can't help but wonder |
| her what she thought of Cognitive Behavioral | | | | how many kids are currently diagnosed with |
| Therapy (CBT); since this is the treatment I read | | | | autism that actually have the same "perfect |
| was the most widely accepted in treating SM. | | | | storm" as my daughter had. I believe trying the |
| Below are some thoughts and suggestions she | | | | Gluten Free / Casein Free diet is always a smart |
| gave me: | | | | thing to do once your child receives any |
| 1. CBT is the right treatment for SM. Sometimes | | | | behavioral disorder diagnosis. I know it does not |
| a psychiatrist is needed to find out if medication is | | | | help all children but if it does help your child, it may |
| recommended. However, Dr. Morgan-Gillard | | | | give them their "typical" life back. |